my birthday meltdown

I had a birthday; maybe a significant one, maybe not.  I turned 39.  I spent the day before, the day of and the day after crying.  I couldn't stop.  I decided to see my psychiatrist.  He told me that it is normal to reevaluate your life on your birthday, and right now I feel like my life sucks.  He also told me that my seretonin levels are probably low, which is causing me to cry all the time and hibernate.  None of the meds I'm on effect my seretonin so he started me on a low dose of Prozac.  Funny, I've never been on that one before.  I know there is a lot going on in my life that meds can't fix and I hope things start getting better soon.   Since I quit my job I am feeling better, so that has helped.  I start my new job on Monday and I am nervous about that.  I have a few days to myself and I need to use those days to do things I want to do and take care of myself.

I did not go to Weight Watchers last week.  We had valentine's day, Tom's birthday, then my birthday in the last two weeks.  We did a lot of celebrating, which meant a lot of drinking and eating.  I didn't do any tracking yet I tried to stick with my plan when I wasn't splurging.  So today I weighed in and I have lost another 1.2 pounds for a total of 13 pounds.  For whatever reason, I thought that I could reach my 10% goal by next week.  I don't think that will happen. Maybe in 2-3 weeks.  Clothes are still getting bigger, so that is a good feeling.  My husband is finding me more attractive (not that he didn't find me attractive before, he says) and I like that, too.  I have 15 more pounds I want to lose.  I don't know why; that's just a number.  Let's just see where it goes.

2 pounds

Last week I gained 0.8 pounds.  Ugh.  I don't know why.  I was sure I had gained this week, too.  I just felt like I had.  I did everything the same except I had gone out one night and had a salad and a couple small margaritas. Still staying within my total points.  Well, I lost 2 pounds this week for a total loss of 11 pounds!  Just 6 pounds away from my 10% goal and 18 away from my ultimate goal.  I am feeling great, I am fitting into smaller pants.  I got rid of my bigger clothes.  This is going well and I'm happy with it.  It's been way too cold to go outside to walk so I've been trying to do things inside.  I've done the Zumba on the wii, but I need to use it on the bigger TV because I can't read the small print and did 3 warm-ups instead of a whole workout.  I also did some yoga from the fitness on demand.  Unfortunately I am more out of shape than I thought I was and I can't do an entire routine.  I just need to keep working on it, though.  Keep doing what I'm doing and I'll continue to be successful.  I hear these people in the meetings who are so gung-ho that all they eat is salads and fruit.  I can't do that, though.  I have to live.  So I eat "regular" food, too.  There is nothing wrong with that.  And some people don't eat their total points for the day, which is not recommended.  I feel like I'm doing what is right for me.  Either way, whatever I am doing is working.

I need to start getting ready for my next 5K, the Sharin' O' The Green on March 12.  That's 5 weeks away.  While it's cold out I can probably use the Wii.  I think there is a walking/jogging routine on the fit plus program.